Watch as Golfer Drills Patrons on Consecutive Drives

There was a time in my professional life where I was invited to play in golf tournaments on a fairly regular basis.

Those invitations aren't rolling in anymore, and I'm more than okay with that.

Golf was never a game I mastered. I would classify my abilities as 'just enough to be dangerous'. I finally made the decision about seven or eight years ago that it was time to stop pretending and stop embarrassing myself, so I quit playing. A few weeks ago, I was reminded of just how long it had been by the size of the spider web on my old clubs, which I found tucked away in the far reaches on my garage!

• Off the Tee: 2015 PGA Championship Preview

Back to those tournaments for a moment. There was no greater moment of anxiety for me than when it came time saunter up to the first tee box to start the round. That opening shot was inevitably the one that would be witnessed by the most people all day, and based on where they were standing (directly in harms way), these people obviously had me confused with someone who knew how to handle a three-wood.

Luckily for me, and especially for them, my tee shots very rarely got any sort of 'air time', usually skidding down the fairway, if I made contact at all.

I had forgotten all about those moments of fear until I came across this old video of a long drive competition somewhere:

I have no idea who this woman is, but based on her actions that day, all I can say is she is either very determined or very delusional.

Either way, I'm just glad that's not me. Goodness knows that footage resembles a lot of my nightmares from back in the day.